takowrites...sometimes

A collection of my miscellaneous thoughts about love When I loved, it was almost as if I experienced a rebirth. I had gone through a metamorphosis almost overnight and quite suddenly within the short space of time it took me to fall in love, two very different versions of myself existed; who I had been before I met him, and who I became after. I do not think I experienced love at first sight, rather that I experienced the sensation of seeing him for the first time and knowing that I was going to fall in love with him. After poring through the internet trying to a find a word that describes this particular feeling, I finally found the phrase I had seen once before, years ago, and tried to find. ‘Koi No Yokan  –  恋の予感 ‘Koi no yokan’ refers to the sense that we have just met a person with whom we will inevitably fall in love. Japanese speakers think of ‘Koi no yokan’ as a premonition of love, solely based upon the feeling that you get after you have met someone and imagi...

  Breakups Suck I've probably been broken up with about 3 times now. My first real heartbreak was in 2019 when this boy I was insanely besotted with dumped me the day of our one month 'anniversary.' I cried at school the very next day to the point that I looked feeble and sickly and my Geography teacher had to ask me if I was okay. During my O Level exams, English Language to be specific, his name appeared in the exam paper and I literally broke down during the exam, but because success is fueled by pain I got an A* in that subject. Navigating heartache while I was in school was probably a lot better than trying to heal out of it, because at least I was forced to go to school and focus on studying and be distracted from my pain. Outside of school, as an adult, there's nobody to push you to get up, exercise, drink water and be productive. It's easy to just waste away and let grief totally encompass you.  During my first heartbreak, it took me months to really g...